Spiritual Growth Stage 2-Inner Conflict
In the Spiritual Growth Stage 2-Inner Conflict state of being, a person is more motivated to be in the world than in stage 1. A person typically feels more energy, desire and typically are achievement-focused. This comes with the challenges of feeling a need to strengthen one’s identity in a world where there are so many opposites.
This Inner Conflict state really points out the differences between “me” vs. “them.” This state also begins the journey into exploring the inner world of time alone with oneself and time with others; it can be hard to have this balance. There is a continual conflict with the way the world is vs. the way a person might desire it to be.
Control is a word that best describes this stage because when we do not feel aligned with our desires, we are in a constant frenzy to try to control and resist what will cause pain and suffering. There is a distinct desire to move towards pleasure and move away from pain. This stage of spiritual development is mostly outwardly focused. A person discovers there is a need inside, and they seek to meet those needs by gaining, achieving, or changing the way their outer life looks and feels.
In many ways, this is the overarching egoic state of our collective consciousness; therefore, we are likely to have many of these characteristics showing up as various parts within ourselves. If we have evolved past this stage in one or more areas, we have determined that this stage is no longer fulfilling. However, even if that’s the case, this stage may still have an intense toll on our psyche, and it may be hard to come out of this stage entirely in some areas or aspects of our lives.
As we progress into the other stages, this stage second stage, Spiritual Growth Stage 2-Inner Conflict, will start to lose its hold. Because of this strong collective pull, we may make progress in the other stages and find that we come back to this one again and again. With awareness and compassion, we can understand that we hardly ever move through these stages in a linear way.
Since this is one of the primary collective states of the world, any person can easily fall into this stage in early childhood, and it can last a lifetime if a person is unconcerned with personal or spiritual growth. Those who are spiritually inclined with traumatic or difficult life experiences may be more likely to move forward from this stage as suffering can be a huge propeller of higher consciousness.
Typical Thought Patterns
I can’t believe they treated me that way!
I am a good person
I am a bad person
I hate my job
There’s too much to do!
I deserve so much better
I didn’t do anything wrong
I never do anything right
Common Emotional Patterns
Mild to moderate depression
Anger and frustration (sometimes resulting from depression)
Up and down emotions
Self-focused and/or inner circle focused (family, friends)
Comparing self to other
Addictions to food, shopping, drugs, technology/phones/games, etc.
Seeking pleasure, avoiding pain.
How It Shows Up In The 4 Major Life Categories
Relationships: The connections with a partner, friends, and family members are the avenues of how one might define or understand themselves. Relationships have expectations and requirements, and turmoil and conflicts arise if they are not met. A person moves closer to those who are more like themselves and repelled by people that challenge their sense of self/identity.
Work/money: Similar to stage 1, scarcity is the underlying feeling- there is never enough. In this stage, though, there is an increased desire to work towards goals and see results. Even if you are not a person who enjoys accumulating material things, this stage is all about more in any sense. Whether it’s more money, more recognition at work, more respect, more fun, etc. Aspects of hard work and effort are put forth as a way to make things happen.
Spiritual/emotional– Emotions are a hindrance to a person in the Spiritual Growth Stage 2-Inner Conflict stage they are either too enmeshed in them or extremely disconnected from them. Suppression and expression often happen- suppression is the way a person avoids feeling what’s arising due to the discomfort of it; and expression is the way a person must express what’s on their mind to get some relief inside from the emotion.
A person may have a dedicated spiritual practice or none at all; this is dependent on a person’s preferences. Spiritual practices mostly serve as a way to meet a goal- the end is the focus instead of the means to get there. There is a lack of feeling present most of the time, and unintentional thinking happens almost constantly.
Health and body-The body is the means of which to strengthen identity. The body’s experience includes a preoccupation with physique/looks and labeling the body as skinny/ fat, good/bad, ugly/pretty, weak/strong, etc. Self-esteem is an important focus either on improving it or feeling not enough.
Body identification might include believing cognitively or innately that they are this body. Even if a person has strong spiritual beliefs of being a Soul or in an afterlife, it might be hard in this stage to truly feel this deep within.
The Next Level of Spiritual Growth- Exploration
In Stage 3- Exploration, a person would be most interested in tapping into their inner power to create more joy and peace for themselves. Those in the exploration stage are interested in caring for their bodies, minds, and spirits, considering themselves spiritual or holistic. Some may be involved in dedicated spiritual practices to discover the truth of their Soul.
A person who has outgrown the Spiritual Growth Stage 2-Inner Conflict will be so tired of the suffering and constant problems that they will seek to make changes. They will start to consider how to better create and rearrange their world to bring them the fulfillment they seek.
To learn much more about this stage and how to deepen your spiritual growth, click here.
The Spiritual Growth Journey
Moving into a state of it has to be better than this, desiring change and a more joyful life, we move into the seeking state a heightened curiosity of what might be. To journey forward, a person in this stage must be willing to look at and be with the shadow parts of themselves and to be willing to take responsibility for the life they lead. An open mind is of utmost importance to enter stage 3 as it requires a willingness to explore places within they may have avoided before.
Your Akashic Records Journey Toolkit
No matter where you are on your spiritual journey, One Awakening offers downloadable Spiritual Journey Kits to help you create more love, peace, and joy in your everyday life. Each toolkit is carefully crafted to work through the challenges in the 5 stages in your Akashic Records.
Each toolkit contains resources to work through all the 4 life categories- Health/Body, Work/Money, Emotions/Beliefs, and Relationships. If you took all four quizzes and realized that you are in several different stages in different areas of your life, this is common! For every toolkit, you purchase, you receive a discount for the next one sent to your email. These are available for pre-order now for over 60% off until June 10th.
If you are new to the 6 Stages of the Spiritual Awakening Journey and would like to learn more, check out this post:
Please note that this information is not a substitute for mental or physical health care; please consult with your providers if in need of support and additional resources.